Dear Diary


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Dear Diary,

The insomnia is back. I’m not sure why and nothing seems to be working to help me fall a sleep. I lay awake, sometimes staring up at the ceiling, other times eyes shut just begging to drift off.

I get up and clean things. I write whatever comes into my head, even though some of it doesn’t make any sense. I read books, until I can’t concentrate. I stargaze if the night sky allows. I try hot baths, pills, hot drinks, mind games, TV shows, I change bedding and sleeping positions. Whatever the advice is I’m doing it.

I’m beyond exhaustion, high on caffeine, just to keep going and surviving.

People think I’m ill and I shrug it off but maybe I am? Have I an illness that is causing the insomnia? I avoid looking it up on the internet – too many misdiagnoses.

It looks like I might have found a help tonight. I’m listening to the sounds of water dripping in a cave. It’s making me feel relaxed and my mind for a change isn’t full of things. I feel sort of floaty….

 

(Note; currently the only thing that is helping me get to sleep at night is listening to this YouTube video;

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3 thoughts on “Dear Diary

  1. I think that water might have me getting up multiple times for the loo.
    Insomnia isn’t helped by caffeine. No caffeine (no, not even from tea) for at least 4 hours before bed. Then no internet and preferably no tv for at least 2 hours before bed. Do not take your phone to bed. Read if you like, preferably something boring; definitely nothing tense and/or exciting. Keep to a regular bedtime. The more hours you put in before midnight the better. Don’t exceed eight hours in bed. Note, in bed, regardless of sleep. Breathing exercises are good. As is meditation.
    Sounds boring, doesn’t it. But it works.

    Liked by 1 person

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