Over D.I.U-ing It#CCC

The hammering woke Mrs. Long before her alarm clock could. She rolled over, reaching for her husband but he wasn’t in bed next her.

Getting up, she crossed the room to draw back the curtains and swung the window opened. Looking down into the garden, she saw her husband. He was removing the rotting back fence.

‘What are you doing now, Tom?’ Mrs Long called.

He turned, peered up at her and shout back, ‘what does it look like I’m doing woman?’

Mrs Long shut her mouth before the angry reply could escape. She closed the window and walked away, thinking that she couldn’t wait for her husband to return to work so she could have some peace.

 

(Inspired by; https://crispinakemp.com/2020/08/26/crimsons-creative-challenge-94/ with thanks).

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Drums

I decide to take up the drums during my furlough in lockdown. I don’t think my neighbours are too happy about my new hobby….

Duckie #3LineTales

The bright yellow duckies had always attracted me. I loved playing with the one I had as a toddler in and out of the bath. Often, I went to bed with it too and my parents were baffled by my attachment to the plastic bath duck.

When we went to anywhere that had a ‘hook a duck’ or something similar game stall, I had to play like an addict at a gambling machine. I didn’t want the stuff animals or other toys for a prize though, I wanted to keep all the duckies!

‘She’ll grow out of it,’ my dad often said but he was wrong. Now, I’m twenty-eight and my collection of plastic duckies has just got me a place in the Guinness World’s Records.  

 

(Inspired by; https://only100words.xyz/2020/07/09/three-line-tales-week-232/ with thanks).

Plans

‘Here are the plans for the wind farm and new pier,’ Tom said and hung his drawing up.

A ripple of sniggers and giggles went around the boardroom.

Tom turned to look at his drawing…

It wasn’t his!

The picture showed a line of wind turbines out at sea and a pier below them and were those stick people on the pier?

It looked like one of his children had tried to cope his finally draft.

‘Erm…sorry,’ Tom mumbled, ‘wrong drawing.’

Shuffling through his papers then his briefcase, Tom tried to keep his cool. He need this to go well and nothing was going to stop him. Realising all his drawings were gone, he coughed and turned back to the boardroom and indicted the drawing presented before the stern business investors.

‘Anyway,’ Tom picked up, ‘as you can see this gives us the rough idea of what is going to happen….’

Guinea pigs

My husband was so unobserved and busy all the time that it took him two years to realise I had gone behind his back and brought our daughters some guinea pigs.

Trying to Juggle

Working from home sounded great but in reality it was horrible. The kids always wanted something then the dog wanted something, then the wife was yelling at the kids or the dog of just in general.

Having a meeting was like dealing doing a deal with the devil. I was tried of telling people to un-mute themselves or turn there sound out or was that a fire happening in their background?

I just wanted a few minutes peace to write this report. My children stuck stickers to my back, I ran the dog’s paw over with my chair and my wife was asking what time I’d finished work because it was my turn to cook tonight.

The house was always a mess, the children kept moving my things and I just wanted my nice clean office back!

Right, enough is enough! I’m going to empty the shed and turned that into a office. I could lock the door and be at peace in there. I could carry my briefcase across the garden each morning and pretend I was going into work. I could get a radio and a coffee machine….

Yes, that’s what I needed, an office away from office.

Mistake #3LineTales

I’m not very good at knitting.

 

(Inspired by; https://only100words.xyz/2020/06/04/three-line-tales-week-227/ with thanks).

 

The Reflective World #FFftPP

I fell through a puddle and ended up in a world that was the same as my own but different because everything was backwards.

I walked the streets and saw the names of shop signs were written backwards. People, cars and animals moved backwards, never seeming to look where they were going but still reaching their destination without accident. I listened to conversation and realised that all the words spoken were backwards too.

‘Why is this?’ I cried.

‘Dlrow noitcelfer a si sith esuacbe,’ a man explained.

I didn’t understand him and laughed.

‘!Edur,’ the man said and walked away.

Going to a playground, I saw children playing and tried to join in but they were all going backwards and I kept going the wrong way! The children shouted at me and pushed me out of the playground.

I fell into a puddle and the world tipped the right way again.

‘Are you all right, love?’ an old lady asked me.

I sat up, looked around and saw everything was right again.

‘Yes, thank you. I’ve just come back from that other world down there,’ I explained and pointed at the puddle.

The old lady winked and said, ‘the reflective world is a fun place to be.’

 

(Inspired by; https://flashfictionforthepracticalpractitioner.wordpress.com/2020/05/13/flash-fiction-for-the-purposeful-practitioner-2020-week-20/ with thanks).

Frog Hunting

I didn’t want my children stuck inside whilst we home schooled. I wanted them out exploring and learning for themselves. So, we went down to the ponds and streams of the wood.

There was lots to see and because it had rained yesterday, everything was full and bright. The children took off their shoes and socks and ran barefooted like pixies as they hunted animals.

‘Look mummy! A bug!’ my youngest cried.

‘It’a beetle,’ I replied.

‘Little fishes!’ cried another.

I laughed and told them, ‘they are tadpoles. Baby frogs.’

‘They don’t look anything alike!’

Simply, I told the children how frogs grew. Fascinated, we watched the black tadpoles swimming around. Then, we heard the croak croak call of a frog.

‘Can you find him?’ I asked.

Giggling, the children dashed off and I sat back and watched their delight. Soon, my oldest came back with his hands cupped together, a proud smile lighting up his face.

‘What do you have there?’  I questioned.

He opened his hands and a large frog jumped out and landed in my lap. With an echoing croak the frog jumped again into a tall patch of grass.

‘Oh no!’ my son cried and darted after the frog.

I laughed uncontrollably.

Shortage

Everyone had gathered on the wave breaker wall, squabbling over space whilst the sea rushed across sand and shells in the background.

‘Quiet! Quiet!’ Storm screeched.

With some gibbering, the gulls hushed.

‘Right, we all know the problem; lack of food!’

‘Aye! Aye! Cor! Cor!’ the gulls cried.

‘So,’ Storm hollered, ‘we need to move inland!’

‘Aye! Cor! Cor! Aye!’

There was a squall as the gulls all spoke at once, ‘Chips, ice cream, fish! Bread, meat! Sweet fluff cloud, sticky things, chocolate!’

Storm flapped his large grey and black tipped wings and let out a massive scream to silence the chatting.

‘Right troops,’ he spoke once they were quiet enough, ‘let’s go find the humans!’